Santa’s Reindeer

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Q : Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?
A : “Rude”-olph!

bulllshit

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Q : Why are there twelve reindeer?
A : No reason!

Red nosed reindeer

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Q : Why did Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer cross the road?
A : Because he was tied to a chicken!

Raulph irregular

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Q : Did Rudolph go to a regular school?
A : No, he was “elf”-taught!

Cristmas is coming

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Q : How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
A : He looks at his calen-“deer”!

Comet cleans sinks

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Q : Did you hear that one of Santa’s reindeer also works as a maid?
A : Yup! Comet cleans sinks!

not good for health

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Q : Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
A : Because they are both tail bearers

He’s a Rain -deer

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Q : Why is Prancer always wet?
A : Because he’s a “rain”-deer!

Gazalles

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What’s red and white and gives presents to gazelles? Santelope!

Reindeer wera fur coats

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Q : Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
A : Because they would look silly in plastic macs!

are you mad

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Q : Which reindeer have the shortest legs?
A : The smallest ones!

horn-aments

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Q :What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
A : “Horn”-aments!

Elk a seltzer

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Q : What do you give a reindeer with an upset tummy?
A : “Elk”-a-seltzer!

lazy workers :D

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Q : How many reindeer does it take to change a light bulb?
A : Eight! One to screw in the light bulb and seven to hold Rudolph down!

This one will seigh you

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Q : What do reindeer always say before telling you a joke?
A : This one will “sleigh” you!

one night challenge for man

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According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to EVERY historical rendition depicting Santa’s reindeer, EVERY single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen, had to be a girl. We should’ve known… ONLY women would be able to drag a fat jolly old man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.

Reindeer stops lunch

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Where do the reindeer like to stop for lunch? “Deery” Queen!

Red nosed pickels

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Q : What’s red and green and guides Santa’s sleigh?
A : Rudolph the red-nosed pickle!

Wear Sunglasses

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Q : Why did the reindeer wear sunglasses to the Christmas party?
A : Because he didn’t want to be recognised!

Change light bulbs

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Q : How many reindeer does it take to change a light bulb?
A : Eight! One to screw in the light bulb and seven to hold Rudolph down!

Reindeer glasses

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Q : Why did the reindeer wear sunglasses to the Christmas party?
A: Because he didn’t want to be recognised!

milk to babay

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Q : When should you give reindeer milk to a baby?
A: When its a baby reindeer!

cleanest antlers

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Q :Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
A : Comet!

Flying reindeer

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Q : how can Santa’s sleigh possibly fly through the air?
A : You would too if you were pulled by flying reindeer!

Rude-olph

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Q : Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?
A : “Rude”-olph!

Santa faces insulting by female deer

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One day, Santa saw a young deer with a glowing nose of red…he smiled at him and waved to young creature. The deer dropped his bottle of gin and exclaimed “Oh Sh!t…it’s Santa!” And ran away. Santa rubbed his beard and shook his head. “I think I’ll call that one Rude-off.”

Prancer always wet

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Q : Why is Prancer always wet?
A : Because he’s a “rain”-deer!

Gossips not good for health

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Q : Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
A : Because they are both tail bearers!

Get into Donners house

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Q : How do you get into Donner’s house?
A : You ring the “deer”-bell!

Reindeer wearing ear muffs

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Q : What do you call a reindeer wearing ear muffs?
A : Anything you want because he can’t hear you!

Pony sleigh

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Q : What does Rudolph want for Christmas?
A : A pony sleigh station!

blind reindeer

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Q : What do you call a blind reindeer?
A : No eye deer (no idea)

Reindeer with three eyes

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Q : What do you call a reindeer with three eyes?
A : Reiiindeer

Cristmias trees

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What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? “Horn”-aments!