Q: What is a camels favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Humpty Dumpty

Q: Why are camels called ships of the desert?
A: Because they are filled with Arab semen!

The elephant asked the camel: “Why do you have your breasts on your back?” The camel clearly irritated by the outrage of modesty replies: “What a silly question from someone who has a dick on his face.”

This general in the Foreign Legion is transferred to a new fort, and half way through his tour of the place, he spots a mangey old camel tied up at the back of the fort. He turns to the corporal: “What in God’s name do you use that for?”, he asks. The corporal replies “Well, sir, there are a lot of men, and now and then, they become, shall we say, horny….” “Ah, yes, yes, I understand. Fine, move on” About 6 weeks later, the general wakes up feeling so horny, he’d get up on the crack of dawn and calls the corporal. “Bring me to the camel” says he. The corporal does, and once at the camel, he makes it stand up, and places a stool behind it. With that, the general stands on the stool, takes out Mr Floppy and inserts it into the camel. He then proceeds to give it the ride of its life. Having finished, he puts away his equipment, and looks proudly at the corporal. “Well”, he says, “is that the way you men do it around here?” “Er…no, sir”, replies the corporal, “We normally just use the camel to ride to the nearest brothel.”

An englishman an irishman and a scotsman were in the sweltering desert walking around looking desperatly for something to eat and drink, when, as if out of nowhere, a camel appeared. The englishman caught the camel and spluttered I support “Liverpool, so I suppose I better eat the liver.” The scotsman immediately shouted, “Well I support Hearts so I’ll eat the heart.” And then the rather mentally challenged irishman said, “I support Arsenal, but I don’t feel hungry any more.

Q: What do camels use to hide themselves?
A: Camelflauge!

Q: How do you have sex with a camel?
A: One hump at a time.

Q: What do you call 144 camels in a box?
A: Gross!

Q: Did you hear about the camel who was accused of stock fraud?
A: He took part in a hump and dump scheme.