Q: What do you call a horse that lives next door?
A: A neigh-bor!
Animal Jokes
Funny animal jokes
Double crosser
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A: He was a double-crosser!
Cow stop to drink
Q: Where does a cow stop to drink?
A: The milky way!
New to the Area
Q :Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
A :Because he was newt to the area!
Her shadow
Q: What’s as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?
A: Her shadow!
what do you mean
Q: What do you get when you cross a bear and a skunk?
A: I don’t know, but it can easily get a seat on the bus!
Plant a frog
Q :What do you get when you plant a frog?
A :A cr-oak tree.
Sore throat
Q: What’s worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
A: A Diplodocus with a sore throat!
He’s Rabbit fan!
Q: Does the Easter Bunny like baseball?
A:Oh, yes. He’s a rabbit fan!
Reindeer wearing ear muffs
Q : What do you call a reindeer wearing ear muffs?
A : Anything you want because he can’t hear you!
Croaker Spaniel
Q :What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
A :A croaker spaniel!
Moles love chemistry
Farmer like a maigcian
Q: When is a farmer like a magician?
A: When he turns his cow into pasture.
Get into Donners house
Q : How do you get into Donner’s house?
A : You ring the “deer”-bell!
Barney in an elevator
Q: What’s green and purple and goes up and down?
A: Barney in an elevator.
Difference between Dog and Alligtaor
Q: What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A: One’s bark is worst than his bite.
Physiologists
Psychologist: What brings you here today?
Squirrel: I realized I am what I eat…..Nuts.
Mule tide greetings
Q: What do donkeys send out near Christmas?
A: Mule-tide greetings.
Peanut Butter
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow?
A: Peanut butter.
Choclate melodt
Q: What did Avogadro get when he mixed ice cream, chocolate syrup, and milk together?
A: A chocolate Moledt
Gatorade
Q: What do alligators drink before a race?
A: Gator-Ade.
Little wine
Q: What did the grape say when the Lemur stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
It just let out a wine
Q: What did the grape say when the otter stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Big as hippo
Q: What is as big as a hippo but weighs nothing?
A: Its shadow!
Evaporated milk
Q: What does an invisible man drink?
A: Evaporated milk!
Koalifications
Q: Why isn’t the the koala a real bear?
A: He doesn’t have the right koalifications.
Act like Chestnut
Q: How do you catch a squirrel with a Katy Perry fixation?
A: Climb a tree and act like a chestnut.
Double Dare
One day, a very rich man announced in a party that if any person present in the party dares to swim across the swimming pool which has more than twenty crocodiles, he will be awarded with either half of the rich man’s property or his beautiful daughter. After a period of silence, the rich man saw a young man splashed into the pool swimming as fast as he can, with all his efforts, saving himself from the crocodiles. And at last, he survived through the pool. Everybody started clapping. The rich man was overjoyed with the young man’s bravery. He congratulated him and then asked what do you want, my property or daughter. To this, the man replied, “Sir, neither I want your property, nor your daughter, I just want the man who threw me in the water.”
To he mooon
Q: “Where did the cows go last night”?
A: “To the mooon”
Navigator
Q: What do you call a crocodile with GPS?
A: A Navi-gator.
Lost all his money
Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
A: I’m paw!
Survival Kit
Q: What do you call a cat that can rough the great outdoors?
A: A survival kit.
Pony sleigh
Q : What does Rudolph want for Christmas?
A : A pony sleigh station!
Pickup your truck
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of badgers. He pulls the guy over and says… “You can’t drive around with badgers in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.” The guy says “OK”… and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of badgers, and they’re all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands… “I thought I told you to take these badgers to the zoo yesterday?” The guy replies… “I did . . . today I’m taking them to the beach!”
Mole acting like idiot
Q: What do you get when you have a bunch of moles acting like idiots?
A: A bunch of Moleasses