Q :What’s grey and moves at a hundred miles an hour?
A :A jet propelled elephant!
Animal Jokes
Funny animal jokes
Lavaly day
Q: What did the dinosaur say when he saw the volcano explode?
A: What a lavaly day!
Pony express
Q: What’s the quickest way to mail a little horse?
A: Use the Pony Express.
Snowy jokes
Q: What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?
A: Owlgebra
Chicken Crosses the road
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum that it could be done!
Big Fingers
Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
A: Because they have big fingers!
Shell-icopter
Q: What do you call a sea turtle that flies?
A: A shell-icopter!
Dead-letter office
Q: Where do dinosaurs get their mail ?
A: At the dead-letter office!
Cross toad with ferry
Q: What do you get if you cross a toad with a ferry?
A: A hoppercraft!
moron platy
Q: Why did the Platypus cross the road?
A: Because he wanted to see his flat mate.
Lawyers are also Alligators
Q: Why won’t alligators attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy!
Cat in a station wagon
Q: What do you call a cat in a station wagon?
A: A car-pet
Religious Tiger
Q: Why are tigers religious?
A: Because they prey frequently, and prey as a family!
Shark Avoid serving
Q: How did the shark avoid serving in the army?
A: He was a conscientious ob-shark-ter
Cows favourite subject in school
Q: What are a cows favorite subjects in school?
A: Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus
Southern hospitality
Q: How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse?
A: With Southern Horspitality!
Chicken cross the playground
Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A: To get to the other slide!
Rabbits learns how to fly
Q: Where do rabbits learn how to fly?
A: In the hare force!
mic needle
Q: How do you inoculate a hippo?
A: With a hippodermic needle.
Lili-gators
Q: Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
A: It’s filled with liti-gators.
Rabbit using computer
Q: What do rabbits put in their computers?
A: Hoppy disks!
How do you call a happy penguin
Q: What do you call a happy penguin?
A: a Pen-Grin!
Little wine please
Q: What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Pick up an Elephant
Q: What do you call a Raccoon that can pick up an elephant ?
A: Sir!
Copy Cat
A Polar bear walks into a restaurant in Churchill and says to the waiter, “I’ll have a seal steak . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and a side order of lemmings.” The waiter says….”What’s with the big pause?” The bear replies, “I don’t know… but my father had them, too!”
Religiuos Eskimo
The devout eskimo lost his favorite Bible while he was ice fishing. Three weeks later, a baby polar bear walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The eskimo couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the polar bear’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, “It’s a miracle!” “Not really,” said the baby polar bear. “Your name is written inside the cover.”
Moltiple choice questions
Q: What kind of test do student moles like best?
A: Mole-tiple choice.
Grasshopper with hiccups
Q:What is green and can jump a mile in a minute?
A: A grasshopper with hiccups!
otter learns language
Q: When does a otter go “moo”?
A: When it is learning a new language!
Avacados number
Q: How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?
A: Avocados number!
Pink Panther Show
Q: What is the most breathless thing on television?
A: The Pink Panter Show!
Favourite president
Q: Who is a ferret’s favorite president?
A: John Fitchgerald Kennedy.
Shark joke
Q: Why did the shark joke book writer’s wife leave him?
A: She wanted to start a relationship with that blond-haired meathead who “wrote” 200 Gross Jokes
Fast food
Q: What does a cat call a hummingbird?
A: Fast food.
Catch a monkey..
Q: How do you catch a monkey?
A: Climb a tree and act like a banana!