Frog Commit Suicide

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Q: How do frogs die?
A: They commit suicide!

European Squirell

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Q: How do you catch a European Squirrel?
A: Climb a tree and act like a metric nut.

They cant catch it

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Q: Why don’t crocodiles like fast food?
A: Because they can’t catch it!

Goat playin the piano

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Q :What do you call a goat playing the piano?
A :Billy Joel.

Touchasaurus Spot.

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Q: How do you upset a dinosaur?
A: Touchasaurus Spot.

Avagadro exagerrate

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Q: How much does Avogadro exaggerate?
A: He makes mountains out of mole hills

Cuts down a tree !!

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Q: What does a logger say before he cuts down a tree?
A: Let the chimps fall where they may.

an octapus

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Q:what do you get when you cross a platypus with 8 tenticles? A: An octa-pus.

Sir???

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Q :What do you call a hamster that can pick up an elephant ?
A: Sir!

Cinderelephant

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Q :What’s grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
A :Cinderelephant!

Mooney

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Q: What do cows get when they do all their chores?
A: Mooney.

how do you??

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A student named Jacob was sitting in class one day and the teacher walked by and he asked her “How do you put an elephant in the fridge?” The teacher said “I don’t know, how?” Jacob then said “You open the door and put it in there!” Then Jacob asked the teacher another question “How do you put a girraffe in the fridge?” The teacher then replied “Ohh I know this one, you open the door and put it in there?” Jacob said “No, you open the door, take the elephant out, and then you put it in there.” Then he asked another question…”All the animals went to the lions birthday party, except one animal, which one was it?” The teacher a bit confused and said “The lion?” Then the student said “No,the girraffe because he’s still in the fridge.” then he asked her just one more question….”If there is a river full of alligators and you wanted to get across it,how would you” The teacher then says “You would walk over the bridge.” Then Jacob says “No, you would swim across because all the alligators are at the lions birthday party!” She laughs and walks away.

Whats yellow?

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Q: What’s yellow, comes from Peru, and is completely unknown?
A: Waterloo Bear, Paddington Bear’s forgotten cousin!

Sharks attacks lawyer

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Q: Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy!

Stinky winkey donkey

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Q: What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye while breaking wind ? A:
A stinkey winkey wonkey donkey

Lamb play outside

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Q: Why couldn’t the little lamb play outside?
A: It was being baaaaaaaad!

Otter is much better than pizza

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Q: What’s the difference between a pizza and an otter?
A: A pizza doesn’t scream when you put it in the oven.

Bronco-saurus

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Q: What kind of dinosaur can you ride in a rodeo?
A: A Bronco-saurus !

A Crocker spanial

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Q: What do you get if you cross a toad and a dog?
A: A croaker spaniel!

Jurassic Pork

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Q: What do you get if you cross a pig with a dinosaur ?
A: Jurassic Pork!

Cow-boose

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Q: Where do cows like to ride on trains?
A: In the cow-boose.

Call a dog magician

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Q: What do you call a dog magician?
A: A labracadabrador.

We don’t have an air conditioner

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A customer was continually bothering the waiter in a restaurant, at first he’d asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.

waiter-serving-food

Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn’t throw out the pest.

“Oh, that man I don’t care.”
said the waiter with a smile. “We don’t even have an air conditioner.”

Its not raining

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Q: When can three giant dinosaurs get under an umbrella and not get wet?
A: When it’s not raining!

Goat listening country music

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Q :What do you call a goat listening to country music?
A :Billy Ray Cyrus.

Bull spies on another bull

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Q: What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?
A: A steak-out!

little wine

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Q: What did the grape say when the badger stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

Bird that lays down

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken with a duck?
A: A bird that lays down!

Mole finance their homes

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Q: How do moles finance their homes?
A: With a molergage!

Star Warts

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Q :What do you get if cross a science fiction film with a toad?
A :Star Warts!

Keep their Nuts Dry

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Q: Why do squirrels swin on there back?
A: To keep their nuts dry!

Gorila griller

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Q. Why did the ape run around with a piece of raw meat on his head?
A. He thought he was a gorilla. (griller)

Eats Gunpowder

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Q: What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
A: She lays hand gren-eggs!

Horse name was Friday

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Q: How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
A: His horse’s name was Friday!