Swimming in Circles

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Q: Why did the shark commit suicide
A: He was tired of feeling like he was swimming in circles

Hippo in phone booth

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Q: What do you call a hippo in a phone booth?
A: Stuck!

Aligator Arms

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Q: How many arms has a alligator got?
A: Depends how far he has got with eating his dinner!

Japenese Shocked Behari Rocks

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The Japanese government offers Rabri Devi a golden deal. “Give us Bihar for a year, We will make it like Japan.”
Rabri Devi replies. “Give us Japan for a month. We will make it like Bihar”.

Dog with no legs

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesn’t matter…. he’s not going to come anyway.

Orson welles

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Q: What was the sharks favorite Orson Welles movie
A: Citizen Kane-i-kokala

Little Whrose

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Q: What do you call a promiscious pony?
A: A Little Whorse

Goat that lip syncs

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Q :What do you call a goat that lip syncs?
A :Billy-Vanilli.

Leatherback Sec turtle

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Q: What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
A: Peanut butter and jellyfish.

March Of Penguins

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Q: What did Morgan Freeman say when Penguins told him they liked March of the Penguins?
A: Why the hell was I narrating it if Penguins can talk

A Brocileasoarus

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Q: What do you call a dinosaur that eats it’s vegetables?
A: A.brocileasoarus

Cross a parrot

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Q: What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark?
A: an animal that talks your head off.

He was Chicken

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Q: Why did the rooster run away?
A: He was chicken!

Hunter aiming

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Q: Why did the hunter miss his mark?
A: He was not aiming deerectly for it.

Cross bambi with host

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Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.

Out oh the way

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Q: What do you get when a dinosaur sneezes?
A: Out of the way!

moltiplication

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Q: What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
A: Moletiplication

Intelligent Grape

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Q: What did the grape say when the ferret stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

Baby owl swimming

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Q: What do you call a baby owl swimming?
A: A moist-owlette

Tea Rex

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Q: How do you ask a dinosaur to lunch?
A: Tea Rex?

Sharks crime

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Q: What kind of photographs do shark crime scene investigators use?
A: Placoid photos

Sheep Get haircut

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Q: Where did the sheep get a haircut?
A: The baa-baa shop!

Qorld weakest animal

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Q: Whats the world weakest animal?
A: A toad, he croaks if you even touch him!

lazy platypus

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Q: Why did the platypus catch the bus?
A: Because he didn’t want to walk.

Bihari in college

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Subject: A class in Bihar College This is a true incident which happened in a college: A new lecturer (also a Bihari professor) was unable to control the class. The guys were just talking without giving any attention to him. So he wanted to send a guy who was creating most of the problem out. But he doesn’t know how to put it in English. He went near the guy. Shouted “follow me” .The guy followed him till he went out of the class. Now the lecturer turned back and again shouted “Don’t follow me” and went inside the class……..
Bihari Professor.
Inside the Class:
Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.
Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.
Cut an apple into two halves -take the bigger half.
Shhh…Quiet, boys…the principal just passed away in the corridor.
You, meet me behind the class.
Both of you three, get out of the class.
Close the doors of the windows please .. I have winter in my nose today…
Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver…..
Take 5 cm wire of any length….

Appetizers

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Q: What do alligators call human children?
A: Appetizers.

Disappointed salesman of Coca Cola

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A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment. A friend asked, “Why weren’t you successful with the Arabs?”

The salesman explained, “When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn’t know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters…

First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand… totally exhausted and panting.

 Desert-man-exhausted

Second, the man is drinking our Cola and

Third, our man is now totally refreshed.

Drinking-coca-cola

Then these posters were pasted all over the place”

“That should have worked,” said the friend.

The salesman replied, “Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn’t realize that Arabs read from right to left…”

Tooth-brush

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Q: What does a dinosaur call a porcupine?
A: A toothbrush.

Bear get so scared

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Q: Why did the bear get so scared?
A: Because he looked in the mirror

move it move it

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Q: Why did King Julien refuse to dance?
A: He didn’t like to “move it move it”

On Gondkoala

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Q: How does a koala get from one place to another?
A: On a gondkoala

I love you flower

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If I was a dog
and you was a flower,
I’d lift up my legs,
and give you a shower.

Penguin Catch at night

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Q: What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
A: Starfish.

School kion aatay ho ?

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Teacher: Tum school kyun aate ho?
Student: Vidya ke liye sir!

Student coming school for vidya

Teacher: Phir tum class mein soo kyun rahe ho?
Student: Aaj Vidya nahi aayi hai isliye sir!!!