Lit FunFunny and short hilarious jokes collection |
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Advertisement Clever Prisoner and the prison guardA prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife: “Dear Husband, I have decided to plant some flowers in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?”
The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a letter: “Dear Wife, whatever you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where I hid all the money.”
A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife:“Dear Husband, You wouldn’t believe what happened, some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up the entire back garden.” The prisoner wrote another letter back: “Dear wife, now is the best time to plant the flower.” M.POfficer: What Is Your Name? Officer: Tell Me Properly. Officer: Your Father’s Name? Officer: What Does That Mean? Officer: Your Native Place Officer: Is It Madhya Pradesh? Officer: What Is Your Qualification? Officer: (angrily) What Is It? Officer: Why Do You Need A Job? Officer: And What Does That Mean? Officer: Describe Your Personality
Officer: Explain Yourself Clearly Officer: This Discussion Is Nowhere, You May Go Now. Officer: What Is It Now Officer: Mental Problems Control over wifeThere were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet. After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, “well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?” The third fellow says “I’ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees.” The first two guys were amazed. “What happened then?” They asked. She said, “get out from under the bed and fight like a man”. Japan Fast, India Very Very Fast There was a Japanese who went to India for sightseeing. On the last day, he hired a cab and told the driver to drive to the Airport.During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan !!!.
The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. And this went on for quite a number of cars. The Japanese exclaimed, “What??… so expensive!” There upon, the driver yelled back, “Meter, Made in India VERY VERY FAST !!!!! Runaway husband
This Middle aged man was going through his mid-life crisis so he went out and bought him a new bright red Porsche. So he decided to take his new Porsche on a test drive down the interstate one day.
He got up to about 85 mph and all of a sudden he saw this highway patrolman with his blue lights and siren blaring coming toward him. He decided he and his new Porsche would outrun the officer. So the man sped up to 95 mph,and then to 105 mph, but the patrolman was still coming.
The man finally came to his senses and said to himself, “This is crazy, I could go to jail for this,” so he pulled over. The patrolman came to the car and told the man, “It has been a long day and I am tired. If you can give me an excuse no one else has ever given me I will let you go.”
So the man told the officer, “Last night my wife ran off with a patrolman and when I seen you chasing me I thought you were trying to bring her back.” The officer looked at the man and said, “Have a nice day.”
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