Q: When do vampires like horse racing?
A: When it’s neck and neck

Q: A man from the olden days rode into town on his horse he spended six days and left on Friday how is this possible?
A: Friday was the name of his horse.

Q: How do you get a horse drunk?
A: Drink him under the stable.

Q: What kind of bread does a horse eat?
A: Thoroughbred

Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
A: Because somebody shouted hay!

Q: What type of a computer does a horse like to eat?
A: A Macintosh

Q: What kind of horses go out after dusk?
A: Nightmares!

Q: Where do you put 2 horses that just broken up?
A: In the pasture

Q: What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse?
A: A tale of WHOA!

There was this young filly whose owners decided to have her “fixed.” The stallion next door was heartbroken, as he’d always wanted to mate with her. He pined for her constantly. Moral of the Story? “A pony spayed is a pony yearned.”

Q: What is a young Colts favorite sport?
A: Stable Tennis.

Q: What did the mare tell her filly after dinner?
A: Clear the Stable.

Q: What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds?
A: A zebra!

Q: How does a winning jockey communicate with his horse?
A: He lays his cards on the stable.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde water-polo player?
A: His horse drowned

Q: Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
A: She always said Neigh

Q: Where do horses shop?
A: Old Neigh-vy!

Q: Why are most horses in shape?
A: Because they are on a stable diet.

Q: How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
A: His horse’s name was Friday!

Q: What do you call a promiscious pony?
A: A Little Whorse

Q: What did one horse say to the other horse?
A: The pace is familiar but I can’t remember the mane.

Q: What did the waiter say to the horse?
A: I can’t take your order. That’s not my stable.

Q: What do you call a horse that lives next door?
A: A neigh-bor!

Q: What do you get if you cross a horse with a bee?
A: Neigh buzz

Q: What do you call a scary female horse?
A: A nightmare!

Q: What kind of horse likes to be ridden at night?
A: A nightmare!

Q: What do you call 144 horses in a box?
A: Gross!

Q: What do race horses eat?
A: Fast Food.

Q: How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse?
A: With Southern Horspitality!

Q: Why was the horse naked?
A: Because the jockey fell off.

Q: How does a cowboy get a stallion to do odd jobs around the farm?
A: Pay him under the stable.

Q: What do you ask a sad horse?
A: “Why the long face?

Q: How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse?
A: With Southern Horspitality!

Q: What’s the quickest way to mail a little horse?
A: Use the Pony Express.

Q: How do you make a small fortune in the horse industry?
A: Start with a large fortune.

Q: Where do horses go when they’re sick?
A: The horsepital!

Q: What do you call a horse that can’t lose a race?
A: Sherbet

Q: Why did the horse eat with its mouth open?
A: Because it had bad stable manners!