Hippo with carrot

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Q: What do you call a hippo with a carrot in each ear?
A: Anything you want as he can’t hear you!

A little wine

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Q: What did the grape say when the hippopotamus stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

mic needle

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Q: How do you inoculate a hippo?
A: With a hippodermic needle.

Devout Cowboy

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The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the savannah. Three weeks later, a Hippopotamus walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the Hippos mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, “It’s a miracle!” “Not really,” said the Hippo. “Your name is written inside the cover.”

hippcratic Oath

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Q: How do you make sure a hippo is telling you the truth?
A: Make him take the Hippocratic Oath.

Hipp-hop

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Q: What’s a hippos favourite kind of music?
A: Hip-hop

Big as hippo

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Q: What is as big as a hippo but weighs nothing?
A: Its shadow!

Hippo in phone booth

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Q: What do you call a hippo in a phone booth?
A: Stuck!

Hippo cross the road

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Q: Why did the hippo cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum that it could be done!

Naughty Hippopotamus

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Q: What do you call a naughty hippopotamus in nature?
A: Hip Hop Hooray…Ho..Hey…Ho.

Hippo learns language

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Q: When does a hippo go “mooooo”?
A: When it is learning a new language!

Ugly hippo

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Q: What time is it when a hippo sits on your bed?
A: Time to get a new bed!

hippothermia

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Q: What happens when hippos get too cold?
A: They get hippothermia.

Hippontism

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Q: How can you get a hippo to do whatever you want?
A: Hipponotism.

Hi -po

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Q: How do you say hello to a hippopotamus?
A: Hi-po!

hippocrite

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Q: What do you call a mean hippo?
A: A hippocrite

My nasty smell wife

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A guy brings a Hippo home , tells his wife it’s a pet.
She asks , “Where are you going to keep it?”
He replies , “In the bedroom.”
“But what about that horrible nasty smell?” ,
she asks. “I got used to you ,
I’m sure he will too!”

Smart Hippopotamus

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A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a Hippo sitting next to him. “Are you a Hippo?” asked the man, surprised. “Yes.” “What are you doing at the movies?” The Hippopotamus replied, “Well, I liked the book.”

Lazy hippopotamus

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Q: What do you call a lazy hippo?
A: A hippopota-mess!

Long heaird hippo

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Q: What do you call a long haired hippo?
A: A hippy

Spelling bee

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Q: What’s more amazing than a talking hippo?
A: A spelling bee!