Q: what is a cats favorite kitchen tool?
A: The “whisker”.

Q: What’s the first thing you say to a cat?
A: HELLO KITTY!

Q: Why did the cat join the Red Cross?
A: Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit!

Q: What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo?
A: An eskimew!

Q: Why don’t cats like online shopping?
A: They prefer a cat-alogue.

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?
A: A stripey sweater!

Q: Did you know that cats designed the great pyramids of Giza?
A: It was all drawn out on paw-pyrus.

Q: What’s the unluckiest kind of cat to have?
A: A catastrophe!

Q: What do you call the cat that was caught by the police?
A: The purrpatrator.

Q: What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?
A: ‘Claws.’

Q: Why did the cat put the letter “M” into the fridge?
A: Because it turns “ice” into “mice”!

Q: What do you call a cat when it is huge?
A: A MEOW-SIVE CAT

Q: What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head?
A: A tiger moth!

Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?
A: Kitty Perry

Q: Did you hear about the cat that climbed the Himilayas?
A: She was a sher-paw.

Q: What do cats wear at night?
A: paw-jamas!

Q: How do the Vietnamese like their soup?
A: Purrrrrfect.

Q: What do you get if you cross a leopard with a watchdog?
A: A terrified postman!

Q: What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A: A Cat has nine lives but a Frog croaks every night!

Q: What do you call a cat that can’t stop licking itself?
A: Purrr-verted.

Q: What do you call a cat that can put together furniture from Ikea?
A: an Assembly kit.

Q: Did you hear about the cat who wanted a dog to teach her how to bark?
A: Curiousity killed the cat.

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?
A: Frostbite!

Q: What do you call a cat in a station wagon?
A: A car-pet

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?
A: Frostbite!

Q: There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
A: None, because they were copycats!

Q: What is the most breathless thing on television?
A: The Pink Panter Show!

Q: What did the alien say to the cat?
A: Take me to your litter.

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?
A: A stripey sweater!

Q: What do you call a lion who has eaten your mother’s sister?
A: An aunt-eater!

Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?
A: ‘Pleased to eat you.’!

Q: What do you call Long John Silver when he has a cat on his shoulder?
A: A purr-ate!

Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar?
A: A sourpuss!

Q: What is smarter than a talking cat?
A: A spelling bee!

Q: What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
A: Sandy Claws!

Q: What is the cat’s favorite TV show?
A: The evening mews!

Q: What do you call a cat who just ate a duck?
A: a duck-filled platy puss.

Q: How are tigers like sergeants in the army?
A: They both wear stripes!

Q: What do you need to get a fast cat to use the litter box?
A: Quicksand.

Q: What is a cats favorite book?
A: The prince and the paw-purr.

Q: Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn?
A: She had a litter of mittens.

Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show?
A: A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!

Q: Why is the desert lion everyone’s favorite at Christmas?
A: Because he has sandy claws!

Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
A: I’m paw!

Q: What do you call a cat that can rough the great outdoors?
A: A survival kit.

Q. How do you know when your cat’s done cleaning herself?
A. She’s smoking a cigarette.

Q: What do you call a cat that gets anything it wants?
A: Purrr-suasive.